Sunday, August 20, 2017

"it was only a kiss (how did it end up like this)"

Hi! I want to share something I wrote. I wrote some of this last year and the rest more recently. This poem is titled “it was only a kiss (how did it end up like this)”. It can be read in four ways: as four individual blocks, in two horizontal chunks, in two vertical chunks, and lastly as one big piece as if there were no spaces in the middle. I wanted to capture the nuanced anxieties that I experience in different types of romantic situations:

  • Romances that primarily started from something physical versus romances that primarily started from more “rational” sources, e.g. shared interests, mutual friends, being “good on paper” for each other (left/right halves)
  • Romances that are short-term versus romances that transform into the relatively longer term (top/bottom halves). 
  • When read together, these four parts collectively reflect my personal insecurities in romance, regardless of how we got together.

This prompts some questions. How important is it to you that love comes about organically? If you find love when you weren’t expecting to, how important is it that you go out of your way to fight for what you have? Which do you prefer: someone falling in love with you (and has a history of falling for others) spontaneously and headfirst, or someone falling in love with you during their (longstanding) intentional, proactive search for love? Can you fall in love slowly but fall out of love quickly? Can you fall in love quickly but fall out of love slowly? Which parts of you are people drawn to in a first impression, which parts of you are people drawn to after they know you well, and how important are these parts when you define your own identity? How have your personal philosophies of love evolved over time?

The title is made of lyrics from Mr. Brightside by The Killers, a song that was played at a lot of the college parties I went to. I think it's very applicable here.